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Ohaiyo Gozaimas!!
iie skip my study camp..
><
iie did not finish my maths homework marhhs...
harhas~
So iie now at chamber with Xue Ling...
((:

The chamber is fcuking cold!!
[*shiver*]

Still hab 3more days till he come back from camp...

[*haishx*]

iie miss him like hell narhhs~

iie wondering what is he doin at camp now...

Doing activities ??

maybe bahhs...

Y-ily-

hmms...

so..

iie hab to go lurhhs...

iie want go play audition!!

xDD

NOTICES TO all 4N1 students;;

Class chalet will be on 12,13,14Nov..

Those who wish to go but haven pay money yet,

pass it to Kong Jiak during the chalet or in school.

like razors,

they cut through her heart

{edited @ 8.05pm

konbawa...

i'm back...

iie went put to meet Bornson,Nigel,Yong qiang etc...

Xue Ling came along with miie...

We walked to 418 to find them.

[*zzz*]

Nothing much happened actually...

we just find them to slack & waste our time...

xDD

iie wonder why...

Nigel and his friends love to disturb Xue Ling ..

& each time they disturb her,

she will go back home...

iie tried to stop them & asked them not to do it.

But they did not heed my advice and they continue to disturb her whenever she come along with me to find them.

hmms~

is it so fun to disturb her...?

iie don't think so...

i'm not trying to say anything as all of them are my friends..

but,

what if one day someone do the same to you...

do you like it?

iie bet you don't ...

iie just hope you all will stop disturbing her,

as she have done nothing wrong...

iie guess that all lurhhs bahhs...

iie going to play audition again...

~~i'm becoming a audition freak when he's not at my side..~~

REPLY OF TAGGIES;;

JASMINE:: okhays... (: when you free you inform miie norhhs... can??

Y-IMY!-

do you know that?

imy so much it hurts like hell!

You're all I ever wanted ;

Miie and him okhays lurhhs...
((:
we have sort out everythings..
On phone and in person...
[*weets!*]
Now iie know the reason why he will treat miie like that...
><

&& this time,

iie promised iie will change..

-stop smoking,sniffing and all the bad things..

To make everyone happy,,

especially him..

=DD

Dardar went to his YLDP camp today morning...

It's at Pulau Ubin..

So far uhhs...

&& iie can't see/call him for 4days!!

As he cannot bring his handphone along...

[*haishx*]

T_T

iie miss him so bad narhhs...

iie wonder how is he doing at the camp...

Hope he won't injured himself...

Y-ily-x333

YYYYY

REPLY OF TAGGIES;;

VIVIANYY:: orhhs~baobei..iie will de.. Must be free when iie call you ehhs.. *LOVES*

HUI YUNYY:: jiehjieh...iie miss you too ! my life arhhs... hmms... hai haO norhhs... ue??

JASMINE:: xiexie nie ((:

Hui ying:: orhhs~ thanks for your concern...

No matter how hard iie try to let go,,

it's so damm hard..

as..

iie still love you..

You're all I ever wanted ;

Ohaiyo...
iie did not go to school today...
*OVERSLEPT*
xD

iie have another quarrels with him and my parents again...

My daddy find out that iie hab ciggerette in my bag...

iie told them it doesn't belong to miie..

But they don't believed miie...

They throw away my ciggarette too!

fcuk laas~

inside still got 4 sticks norhhs...

&& a packet of ciggarette isn't cheap!

iie lied to them...

Those were mine actually..

whenever i'm so stress out of fcuk up with my life,

iie will smoke..

~~iie hate myself for being a smoker & a fcuk-ed up life!~~

~~noone will be there for miie during the holidays,,not even him..~~

[*haishx*]

Xue Ling tell miie somethings.

It's about him...

[*haishx*]

For the time being,iie think iie should slowly let go of him...

as mian qiang bu shi xin fu de...

iie won't be sad about it...

as it's me who's letting go of him...

This is my promise..

iie hab suffered enough..

&& iie really want it to end..

Even if iie break with him,he won't feel anything as his heart is no longer with miie anymore..

So what's the point of holding on to him...

right??

~~IIE JUST WANT TO BE WITH YOU FOREVER..~~

~~izziit so difficult ?~~

RAWRRRRR!
He lied to miie..
He said he would giib mie a tagg ytd...
He ignored my messages;
did not pick up my calls...
ETC...
All the things that happened in the past are happening again...
It seems that this relationship will end sooner or later...

anyway...
iie won't be posting a lot of things on my blog,
maybe for a month or longer than that..
iie guess..
until my feelings and problems are sort out...
iie might not be blogging..
but iie will reply the taggies..
(:

i'm going out now...
*sayonara__.

You're all I ever wanted ;

Tears are rolling down my cheeks when i'm typing this...
You all can choose not to believe it,
but it's the truth...
Because of my gan di,
he vent his anger on mie and say those hurtful things to miie that night...
My gan di and iie are very close but he will alwys be my gan di...
NOTHING ELSE...
Even if you are jealous,you can tell miie right?
You don't hab to say those mean things to miie right...?
Maybe you don't feel a thing,
but do you know how much those words impact miie?
It hurts miie too...

I'M REALLY TIRED OF CRYING...

It always make people thinks that i'm a cry baby..

So what if iie am one...

iie can't help it,right?

It's a part of my personality..

iie can't change it unless iie hab super powers,

or iie commit sucide and reincarnated..

i'm tired of quarreling with you too...
Do you think iie like to make you so unhappy??

the fact is iie HATE it!!

As you are always so busy,

iie often find my gan di out to accompany me..

iie can prOmise you iie won't fall for them..

But can you just find some time to pei miie during the holidays too??

it might not be the whole day...

a few hours will do..

that all iie need from you..

izzit so difficult to fulfill my wish?

iie really feel like ending my life right now...

I'm suffering and it hurts too deeply..

i'm nothing in this world..

even if iie really die,no one will knows or bother about it..

as noone really cares...

xing gan xing yuan,

that's miie...

[*haishx*]

In the end,

i'm always left alone..

iie do't know why...

iie guess during the holidays,

iie will be much more emo and lonely...

As all sisters have someone special to accompany then and sacrifice their time for them...

iie envy my sister and their steads..

They are always so happy and their steads are so caring...

They seldom quarrel..

&& they always meet up too..

~~iie can say that iie am jealous ..~~

as it's totally different in my relationship now...

This is what iie feel ...

T_T

iie hate to be alone sometimes..

but iie can't help it..

&& nobody knows...

All of them were so busy during the holidays that they will forget about me..

it happened once...

[*haishx*]

IS THERE ANYONE WHO CAN PULL ME OUT OF MY LONELYNESS & SUFFERINGS?

SAVE ME , PLEASE...

it seems that i'm getting emo-ier every second...

iie want to run away from everything;

it might help miie temporary;

but not forever...

[*LOVE hurts!*]

You're all I ever wanted ;

MushiMushi~
i'm back from school...
So tired narhhs...
We walked from sembawang holding campus to the new Yishun campus...
[*sweating!*]
We were sweating like hell narhhs...
eeyer...
chou chou..
xDD
Our class were super hyper on the way to the Yishun campus..
We started singing songs loudly!
[*LOLS*]
So paiseh narhhs~
All the residents were looking at us..
harhas~
We start the walk at 8.30am and ends at 10am.

When we reached the Yishun campus,
our class were sing the school songs...
The band were welcoming us back...
We were yelling ...
><
4n1 were crazy laas...
xD
We sat at the parade square which used to be the staff room,
waiting for the rest to settled down..
The teacher gave us an announcement and we went for a tour around the new school from 10.30AM-11AM...

The new school gonna have...
;; the chairs and tables that cafeteria use instead of the long tables and chairs for the canteen,
;; indoor sports hall,
;; air conditioned hall,
;; a fiasco,
;; a performance stage outside the canteen...
etc...
iie don't remember lurhhs...
><
But the school is very big and spacious!
It's nice too,although the school is still under renovation..
(:
We went to our classroom and it's big...
We are having new tables and chairs too!
=DD

zen me ban...

iie wish to study sec 5 in the Yishun campus..

iie hope iie can go sec 5..

urghh!

i'm going insane over the school..

xDD

Dismissed at 11am....

Sally,Sharon,Qi Wei,Qiu Di,Shu Ping and iie went to the North Point foodcourt for our lunch..

We walked past Long Jhon Silver and it's full of students from YTSS...
harhas~
it seems that their business is back ...
Must thanks YTSS de pupils worhhs...
xDDD

So now,
i'm sick...
x'(
I'm having a sore throat from all the fun iie had earlier...
[*haishx*]
Somemore iie still drink cold drinks and eat chocolates...
iie think my sore throat will get worst..

{edited @ 5.30pm}

So...

i'm really sick...

For the problems between him and Miie,

iie will need to follow my heart barhhs...

So my decision is to continue being with him although he hab hurt mie so much...

as ie LOVES him...

Until the day iie can't stand him anymore,

iie will slowly let him go bahhs...

but,iie think that won't happen to me..

maybe he will...

But now,i'm still a bit confused with my feelings..

iie don't know whether iie should trust him again...

I'm afraid that he love me and be with me just because of the prOmise...

iie am afraid of love now..

zen me ban nerhhs?

iie know i'm a bad girl..

& i'm not worthy of his love..

iie smoked,sniff glue and always hang out with guys...

One thing iie always hang out with guys is because they are fun to be with...

They always make me smile when i'm unhappy...

If you all want to think that i'm a flirt,

then let it be..

i've got nothing to say anyway..

iie need to go and rest now...

my throat hurts...

T_T

he ignored me again...

[*haishx*]

is he really that busy that he totally forgets about miie?

.__wo shi zhen ai ni__.

.__bu yao li kai wo,hao ma?__.

.__promise you will really love me till eternity__.

REPLY OF TAGGIES;;

NATASHAYY:: iie think iie am fine.. x= ilu~

VIVIANYY:: yeapps...haishx... my phOne currently out of order as my bill is $280+++ X(

You're all I ever wanted ;

hellos!!

iie only slept for 3to4hours ytd..

No matter what iie do,iie STILL can't fall asleep..

[*haishs*]

Thank xue ling for accompnying me to chat on the phone..

but next time,you tired lurhhs just tell miie...

bie hai wo zai ling wai yi bian fa tai..

xDD

i'm face with problems again...

it's so huge that iie want to scream and run away from it..

but it's no use rght?

IT WILL ONLY MAKE MATTERS WORST...

Benjamin and iie chatted on the phOne ytd...
He told me that we were drifting apart..
and he wanna break as he wanted freedom of having no stead...
FREEDOM?!?!
harhas~
iie seldom contact him lurhhs...
NOt even msg or chat with him on phone...
He do whatever shit outside iie also don't care lurhhs...
Is that not enough?
We have been together for so long but he still confused about his feelings..
><>truly loves me or is it because of the promise he made..
But in the end,
we are still together but,iie will only treat him as friends..
He want freedom?
Fine,
iie give him freedom..
(:
Topday morning,he sms-ed me to ask me whether iie can love him once more...
iie don't know the answer...
HE HURT ME TOO MUCH!

iie don't know what to do now...
should iie still accept him ..?
or let him go...?
[*haishx*]
Anyone can give me advice??

iie wish ie am DEAD right now...
><

REPLY OF TAGGIES::
VIVIANYY:: After 9nov then iie am free worhhs...x(
WINSHENG:: you say de wOrhhs... promise?? xDD
NATASHAYY:: iie miss you lyk hell too!! <33>

JOLEENYY:: hmms~ town??

.__ LOVING YOU IS TOUGH__.

You're all I ever wanted ;

OhaiyO~
iie now at chamber with Nigel and Bronson..
They are my didi narhs~
(x
Actually,xue ling got come along de...
But she is still lying on her bed...
SLEEPING!
harhas...

XUE LING::
I MISS YOU!!
<333
FASTER WAKE UP UHHS~

Got to go,,
I'm going to play maple/O2jam...
(:
tata~

YYYYYYYYY

REPLY OF TAGGIES;;
EMOstatic_LJY :: thx ehhs... (: iie also want to learn Japanese!!
HUIYUNYY:: jiehjieh;promise me worhhs ? okhays?? (: *imy*
REGINA:: lols! icic... x33 you then pretty narhhs... i'm not.. x)
NIGEL:: you 'baichi' arhhs... can't you see the sentence ' don't mistaken' ? LOLS~
JOLEENYY:: arigatOu! you too uhhs~ hang out one day yea?
WINSHENG:: got mehhs? LOLS~
CHRISTINEY:: LOLS~ my chinese is also becoming worst! hu you like hurhhs? xP
PIGHEADYY:: you pig! so good arhhs? come & tagg miie.. xDD *ily*

thoughts are running through my head.

So many things are left unsaid.

EDITED @ 10AM}

iie stOp playing lurhs...

we are gOing to Bronson's house as Nigel said that he is very siians-ed...

Nothing to play de...

harhas~

iie LOVE you...

but iie hate you too..

why am i having this feeling?

i'm so *confused*..

Just to let you know...

iie want to be closer with you...

iie don't want to quarrel with you anymore..

i'm tired of it..

Let's not let the small misunderstandings or quarrels bother us..

we will last FOREVER ehhs??

&& stay happy always too uhhs~

You're all I ever wanted ;